Are nerves stopping you from speaking Italian?
When you’re learning a foreign language, it’s normal to have a bit of a block when it comes to speaking.
In fact, when we asked our students about their biggest challenges when learning Italian, most mentioned overcoming speaking nerves.
Between forgetting the words, making mistakes and the effort it takes to string a sentence together, it can feel like you’re a child again. It’s understandable your nerves start to show.
But you can get past these challenges and start speaking Italian. We’ve seen lots of our students do it, and you can too!
In this article, you’ll learn how to overcome your speaking blocks and pick up some specific phrases to handle conversations with Italians.
If you’d like some extra help from kind and friendly Italian teachers, you can learn more about our online Italian school here.
But for now, what’s causing those speaking nerves? Let’s learn how to deal with them so you can start speaking Italian!
Afraid you’ll make a mistake?
“I’m afraid I’ll make too many mistakes” - is perhaps your first answer.
As your heart rate jumps, you’re thinking: “what if I used that verb wrong?” and… “oh, damn, that was definitely not the right thing to say…”
The thing is: everyone makes mistakes. You have to, if you want to learn a language.
Instead of getting frustrated by your mistakes, try to see them as a learning opportunity:
“I probably did use that verb wrong… interesting… I wonder why?”
When you approach your mistakes with curiosity, rather than frustration, you’ll find gaps in your knowledge and learn how to say it right next time. And the lessons that come from real-life mistakes will stick with you far more than anything you read in a textbook.
So, by all means aim to speak “correctly”, but don’t let perfectionism hold you back from starting to speak Italian.
But what if you simply don’t feel you know enough?
Just don’t feel ready to speak yet?
“I’ve been learning for years but… I don’t quite feel ready to use my Italian.”
When are we ready to speak Italian? Is it a matter of weeks, months or years?
Everyone has this impression when they’re learning Italian that one morning you wake up with a feeling that says: “I’m ready to speak Italian!”
Unfortunately for those waiting for this moment like a letter from Hogwarts, it’s never gonna happen.
If you wait to feel ready to speak Italian, you’ll never start.
So, what does that mean? You should begin with your first word?
Absolutely. Start with what you know. Buongiorno (good morning)… grazie (thank you)… And you’re away!
Later, you’ll learn phrases to take your conversations further, but by all means, begin your next interaction with Italians in Italian. Even if you don’t get very far, you’ll be amazed by the number of new little expressions and phrases you’ll naturally encounter.
But what if you just sound a bit… silly?
Think you’ll sound silly or look stupid?
“When I speak Italian, I feel like everyone is suddenly listening and silently judging me…”
There are two ways to deal with this common feeling.
The first thing is to realise that people around you are unlikely to be judging you. Chances are no-one is paying you any attention, apart from the person you’re speaking to.
Italians are likely to be impressed by your willingness to learn their language, even if you only manage a word or two at first. Other foreigners who overhear you will probably be wishing they’d learned more Italian themselves.
And remember, you’re still learning! No one expects learners to say everything perfectly. To take the pressure off, try starting the conversation like this:
Provo in italiano, va bene? Mi aiuta? - I’ll try in Italian, is that OK? Will you help me?
By saying this, you’ll instantly dispel any awkwardness as you start to speak. Plus, Italians are bound to help you out even more.
The second thing is to focus on your pronunciation. If you can be confident you’re saying the phrase right, this will ease your fear of “sounding silly”.
A lot of students hold the mistaken belief that good pronunciation is somewhat random. Some people seem to have reasonably good accents, while others struggle for years without ever sounding any less “foreign”.
Actually, you can improve your pronunciation in the same way you would other language skills, like grammar or vocabulary - by learning, practicing and getting feedback!
In the Joy of Languages Italian school it’s something we really pay attention to, because getting the pronunciation right will help you build confidence in speaking. We have a whole course focused on pronunciation, as well as live speaking classes.
In a Joy of Languages class, you don’t need to worry about feeling awkward or “sounding silly”, because our teachers understand the challenges you might be facing and will do their best to help you feel at ease.
For more information, click here to learn about our Online Italian School.
Now then, are you ready for some practical Italian phrases to deal with specific speaking challenges?
For example, what to do if the right word suddenly doesn’t come to you?
Worried you’ll run out of words?
We all know that feeling - you’ve made it through your first sentence of a conversation when suddenly your mind’s gone blank and you can’t remember a really basic word.
And once it’s happened to you a few times, this fear of not knowing specific words can really start to make you think twice about starting a conversation in Italian.
For example, imagine you want to order a glass of wine in a restaurant.
You remember “I would like” is vorrei.
Wine is definitely vino.
But how do you say glass???
In these situations, there’s a great phrase to use:
Come si dice…? - How do you say…?
It’s like the get-out-of-jail-free card of languages. Not only does this little question allow you to learn something new, it also allows you to build a relationship with native speakers. They almost always enjoy helping you out and are often amused - in a good way - by the interaction.
Here’s how it looks in an example:
Come si dice “glass” in italiano? - How do you say “glass” in Italian?
Ah! Glass? Si dice “bicchiere”. - Ah! “glass?” You say: bicchiere
By using this phrase, you’ll maintain the conversation in Italian and start learning lots of new words in their natural context.
Of course, if you use it over and over with the same person, then it will quickly get tiring. It’s perfect for that one little word that’s slipped your mind.
But what if it’s not what you say, but what someone else might say back to that unnerves you?
Worried you won’t understand?
Inglese o italiano? Hmm… how brave are you feeling?
Italians often give you the choice of language - especially in bars or restaurants, for example.
We would of course recommend you choose italiano - but how can you manage these conversations so they don’t suddenly overwhelm you with a torrent of words?
The best way is to tell the other person you’re learning and would appreciate whatever kind of help they might be able to give.
For example, if a waiter asks you to choose Italian or English, you could say:
Italiano lento, per favore! - Slow Italian, please!
Say this with a smile, and you’ll easily convey that idea that you’re keen to give Italian a go, but not certain you’ll understand full speed. Or you could be even more direct:
Italiano per favore: sto imparando! - Italian please: I’m learning!
Preferisco l’italiano, vorrei praticare - I prefer Italian, I’d like to practise
With these phrases you’re lowering the expectations of the waiter, in this case, and avoiding them reeling off the specials at light speed - followed by that awkward, expectant silence.
Of course, if you don’t understand what someone’s said then these phrases are really useful:
Scusi, non ho capito - Sorry, I didn’t understand
Può ripetere, per favore? - Can you repeat (that), please?
Finally, if they do repeat something but you still don’t understand, you can always ask them to say it a little slower:
Più piano, per favore - Slower, please
Now you know what to say if you don’t understand - but how can you make sure Italians don’t find helping you with their language frustrating?
What if Italians find you annoying?
A final worry our students had was that Italians would be exasperated by having to slow down, repeat things and generally help learners out.
It’s true that if you ask the same person for too many words or make someone repeat something too many times, it can feel a bit awkward.
To show your appreciation for their help, you can say:
Grazie per la pazienza - Thank you for your patience
Literally that’s:
Grazie = thank you
Per = for
La pazienza = the patience
A small phrase like this will go a long way to winning Italians over to your side.
You could also say:
Grazie per l’aiuto - Thank you for your help
Or to really make ‘em smile:
Grazie per la lezione! - Thank you for the lesson!
Pronunciation wise, remember the “z” sound in grazie, lezione and pazienza is like a “ts” sound, like the Z of pizza.
Finally, it’s important to be patient and to avoid putting pressure on yourself to communicate everything in Italian immediately. Remember that it’s normal to struggle as you reach the limits of what you can say: it’s all a natural part of learning a language!
Go forth little by little, trying to pick up something new from each conversation, and your speaking skills will improve over time.
So, now you’ve learned some tips and key phrases and tips to put aside your nerves and start speaking Italian!
Before you rush to test your knowledge in our mini quiz below, here’s a quick review!
Nervous to Speak Italian? Here’s what to do: Review
In this article, you picked up some advice to help deal with speaking nerves.
Afraid you’ll make mistakes? That’s totally normal - and necessary.
Not “ready” to speak? Well - we think you are!
Think you’ll sound silly? Far from it!
If you’re still worried about sounding silly, use this magic phrase to take the pressure off:
Provo in italiano, va bene? Mi aiuta? - I’ll try in Italian, OK? Will you help me?
And you learned quite a few other handy phrases to deal with speaking situations.
To ask for words you can’t remember, use:
Come si dice…? - How do you say…? (followed by the word you need)
To encourage people to talk to you in Italian, try these phrases:
Italiano lento, per favore! - Slow Italian, please!
Preferisco l'italiano, vorrei praticare. - I prefer Italian, I’d like to practise.
Sto imparando - I’m learning
If you don’t understand someone you can say:
Scusi, non ho capito - Sorry, I didn’t understand
Può ripetere, per favore? - Can you repeat (that), please?
Più piano, per favore - Slower, please
Finally, to make Italians smile and ensure conversations go smoothly, try these:
Grazie per la pazienza - Thank you for your patience
Grazie per l’aiuto - Thank you for your help
Grazie per la lezione! - Thank you for the lesson!
So there you have it. Now, to test your knowledge, try our quiz below!
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Vocabulary: Nervous to Speak Italian?
Italiano lento, per favore! = Slow Italian, please!
Come si dice… = How do you say…
Non ho capito = I didn’t understand
Più piano, per favore = Slower, please
Può ripetere, per favore? = Can you repeat (that) please?
Preferisco l'italiano, vorrei praticare. = I prefer Italian, I’d like to practise
Provo in italiano, va bene? Mi aiuta? = I'll try in Italian, is that OK? Will you help me?
Sto imparando = I’m learning
Grazie per la pazienza! = Thanks for your patience
Grazie per l’aiuto! = Thanks for your help
Grazie per la lezione! = Thanks for the lesson
Quiz: Nervous to Speak Italian?
How much did you learn? Find out in the quiz!
Click here to take the quiz for this episode: Nervous to Speak Italian?
Flashcards: Nervous to Speak Italian?
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Transcript: Nervous to Speak Italian? Here’s what to do
Please note, this is not a word for word transcript.
K: Ciao a tutti e benvenuti! Hi everyone and welcome to “Learn Italian with Joy of Languages”.
Before we get started, we wanted to let you know that the doors to our Online Italian School are opening very soon, on Thursday, 7th Sept.
M: Sìììì! And we’d love to see you there!
K: To learn more, click the link in the podcast description.
In the school we do everything we can to create a friendly environment, where students can feel comfortable to have a go at speaking. Because we know it can be nerve wracking.
M: Yeah, I think we all have that problem when speaking a foreign language. I know I did (and still do sometimes) when speaking English.
K: What were you most nervous about?
M: Probably making mistakes. Especially because in school, making a mistake was treated like such a big deal.
K: Yeah, I think that’s probably the most typical problem. We’re always afraid of not speaking correctly. You’re constantly thinking: “what if I used that verb wrong” or “how awkward if I choose the wrong word”.
The thing is though, everyone makes mistakes. In fact, you have to make mistakes to learn. It’s part of the process.
Instead of getting frustrated by your mistakes, try to see them as a learning opportunity. For example, when you make a mistake, think: “Hmmm, I probably did use that verb wrong… interesting… I wonder why?”
Give yourself permission to be a curious learner - this way you’ll start to welcome your mistakes because they’ll help you learn how to say it right next time.
M: And the lessons that come from real-life mistakes will stick with you far more than anything you read in a textbook.
K: True! As we learned in the last episode, once you ask for a pene (a penis) at the post office, when what you really want is a penna (a pen), you learn how to say penna, with a long ‘nn’ and an ‘a’ at the end, very quickly!
M: And finally, it’s good to remember that in conversation, we Italians are focusing on what you say, not how you say it.
K: You are your own worst critic.
M: Unless you’re cooking for Italians… In that case, you can find plenty of critics…
K: But if you’re just speaking Italian, you’ll be fine. What’s another reason we’re nervous to speak Italian?
M: Oh, maybe you don’t feel “ready”.
K: Ah yes, not “ready” - I think it’s related to being worried about making mistakes. Here’s a little not-so-secret secret. I still make loads of little mistakes all day when speaking Italian. With the most basic stuff, like masculine and feminine, the stuff you learn in the first lesson. That’s normal even at an advanced level. If I’d waited until I was ready to speak Italian, I’d have never actually started speaking. So, stop waiting - you’ll never be “ready”. You just need to go for it!
M: So, what does that mean? You should begin with your first word?
K: Absolutely. Start with what you know. Buongiorno (good morning)… grazie (thank you)… And you’re away! Later, you’ll learn phrases to take your conversations further, but by all means, begin your next interaction with Italians in Italian. Even if you don’t get very far, you’ll be amazed by the number of new little expressions and phrases you’ll naturally encounter.
M: I think another reason people get nervous is that they’re worried about sounding silly - not only to Italians but also to other people who are learning.
K: You have this idea that everyone is silently judging you. It’s terrifying. But actually, people are unlikely to be judging you, and more likely to be admiring you for giving it a go.
M: And remember, you’re still learning!
K: No one expects learners to say everything perfectly. To take the pressure off, try starting the conversation like this:
Provo in italiano, va bene? Mi aiuta? - I’ll try in Italian, is that OK? Can you help me?
Provo in italiano (x3) - I’ll try in Italian
Va bene? (x3) - Is that OK?
Mi aiuta? (x 3) - Can you help me? Literally “me, you help?”
Provo in italiano, va bene? Mi aiuta?
K: By starting in this way, you won’t worry so much about needing to say everything perfectly, and Italians will help you out.
M: I also find that focusing on pronunciation helps with the worry of sounding silly. When you know you’re saying the phrase right, you feel better about it.
K: This is true, and you can improve your pronunciation in the same way you would other language skills, like grammar or vocabulary - by learning, practicing and getting feedback!
This is something we pay quite a lot of attention to, both in our podcast episodes and in our online Italian school. It’s important, because getting the pronunciation right helps you build confidence in speaking.
Let’s move on now to some situations that stop us from speaking, and learn some specific phrases to help deal with them.
What was the first one, Matteo?
M: Oh… it’s on the tip of my tongue…
K: Running out of words - what can you do if you can’t remember the particular word you need? It can be frustrating when you’ve studied so much Italian, but then for some reason, whenever you go to actually speak you forget all your vocabulary.
For this situation, there’s a great little phrase that every learner should know:
M: Come si dice….
K: How do you say…
M: Come si dice…. (x 3)
K: I used (and still use) this phrase all the time when learning Italian and other languages, probably to the point of annoyance! It’s a great way to learn words when you’re starting out Italian too. Here’s how it sounds in a sentence. Let’s imagine our dog Brody wants to eat mangiare, and I’m looking for her bowl.
M: Shh Katie, be careful, Brody might hear you.
K: If I can’t remember the word for “bowl”, I can ask Matteo:
K: Matteo, come si dice “bowl” in italiano? - How do you say “bowl” in Italian?
K: Breaking that little phrase down you’ve got:
M:
Come - how
Si - one
dice - says, as in “how does one say”. That’s how we ask this question in Italian.
M: Come si dice!
K: Once you know this phrase, you don’t have to worry about forgetting a word. In fact, so long as you don’t overuse it, it involves the person you’re speaking to in your learning process in a really nice way. So, Matteo, come si dice “bowl”?
M: Si dice “ciotola”. Ciotola (x2)
K: Moving onto another situation that makes students nervous to speak: not understanding what the other person says.
M: Yes, Italians often give you the choice of language
K: This happens especially in bars or restaurants, for example, they’ll ask:
M: Inglese o italiano? (x3)
K: And it’s a bit like: Hmm… how brave are you feeling?
There’s this great temptation to give up the speaking opportunity because you’re worried you won’t understand them, and it might be horribly awkward after you’ve asked to speak Italian. To deal with this, there are a few phrases you can use to manage expectations. My favourite is:
M: italiano lento, per favore! - Slow Italian, please!
italiano lento, per favore (x 3)
K: Italians will understand you’re learning, and won’t then rush into a complicated phrase that you have no chance of understanding. You could also try saying:
M: Preferisco l’italiano, vorrei praticare - I prefer Italian, I’d like to practise
preferisco - I prefer
l’italiano - Italian
vorrei - I’d like
praticare - to practise
Preferisco l’italiano, vorrei praticare (x 3)
K:
Or simply:
Sto imparando - I’m learning
sto - I am
imparando - learning
Sto imparando (x 3)
K: With these expressions you’re sharing the fact that you’re learning and indicating to Italians basically: feel free to help me out a bit… By involving Italians like this you really start making your learning fun, whilst also using Italian more.
A final phrase to learn for now, which will help you sound really smooth when you start talking to Italians and asking for help, is to thank them:
M: Grazie per la pazienza - Thanks for your patience
That’s:
Grazie - thanks
per la - for the
pazienza - patience
K: This kind of expression will really win native speakers over, and make them more likely to help you with your Italian even more.
So we talked about the different kinds of things that made our students nervous to start speaking Italian:
M: making mistakes
K: Don’t worry - everyone makes them (including me). And they’re very handy because they help you learn faster
M: not feeling “ready”
K: If you keep waiting, you probably never will be. Go for it and start with what you have, even if it’s only a few words - you’ll build from there.
M: or sounding “silly”
K: You almost certainly don’t! But if you’re worried about sounding silly, one handy technique to lower the pressure is to say: “I’ll try in Italian, is that OK? Can you help me?”
M: “Provo in italiano, va bene? Mi aiuta?
K: We then looked at some more useful phrases, and here they are one more time. See if you can remember the Italian before Matteo repeats the phrase:
K: How do you say…?
[...]
M: Come si dice…?
K: Slow Italian, please!
[...]
M: Italiano lento, per favore!
K: I prefer Italian, I’d like to practise
[...]
M: Preferisco l’italiano, vorrei praticare
K: I’m learning
[...]
M: Sto imparando
K: Thanks for your patience
[...]
M: Grazie per la pazienza
K: These tips will get you started, but really the most important thing you can do to build your confidence in speaking is practice, practice, practice. Especially if you’re feeling nervous about it, it helps to start in a supportive environment, like in our online Italian school. Here, you don’t need to worry about making mistakes, or sounding silly. Because we know you’re learning.
M: And just think, if you already said everything perfectly, we wouldn't have a job!
K: It’s true! All of our teachers are friendly, patient and understand the challenges you might be facing.
M: And everyone does their best to help you feel at ease as you build your confidence and start speaking Italian.
K: If you’d like to find out more, follow the link in the description for this podcast.
M - See you next time.
K - Or as we say in Italian.
Alla prossima!
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